If You Have Time To Stand And Stare .....

  Completely 'knee jerk' espousal coming up, here. But, fuck me ....!

  I've been up all night. Body clock's shot to shit. And I have an unbelievable new bird trap out there. 

  This thing's incredible! Absolutely! Basically? I set it. I catch birds. It really is as simple as that!

  And dear god, what birds! Any fucking birds, to be honest! There's hardly a bird in the area Not wearing one of my rings now. House sparrow to Hooded Crow! I've had the fucking lot in there!

  So; I've been up, all night. 'Drunk myself sober' ~ if I ever actually got pissed? Never noticed it, if I did. And the sun's long since come back up. I've just made a mugga tea. I'll pull an all nighter, today. Fuck it.

  But, yeah! Had this trap set. Knowing I'd be awake to check it, shortly after dawn. And so I decided to let the Dogs out when I did.

  Nothing in it, yet. Plenty of birds about though. I was delighted to see the starlings come into boxes 5 and 7. Bringing food to their, soon to fledge, broods.

  Smiled at the Doglets, wandering around doing their things, as I leaned my elbow on the gate. Turned round, to look at the trap again. Shit my fucking self!

  Fucking Hare had been turning, as I turned. Barely twenty foot from me!

   She'd come loping down a hundred and fifty yards of straight track. Got within half a dozen of me. Been spooked by my movement. Now, she was loping off back to where she'd come from.

  Un fucking believable! Haven't seen a hare, here, in a few years or so now. And there's one, sneaking up on me like something out of Josie Wales!

  Talk about 'Living The Dream', eh?!

 

Never, When Ye Have A Camera ....!

  So; The Farrier was due up, this morning. Pat and I herded Rosie and the donkeys into the crush pen and were just sort of hanging around, kicking stones. Then Pat says; " What's that? Up the track ~ Hare? " 

  I stepped out and had a squint. Hard to make out what the fuck it was, to be honest. Hundred bloody yards away, with my eyes. But, yeah, I managed to discount Piney or fox. When it finally loped off, it was clearly a hare.

  Lovely to see one's back. Haven't seen one in years. Not that I've been out looking. But, there it was. Random, chance meeting. Nice.

  Farrier came. Nice young lad. Very good with the horses. Fast. Thorough. Efficient. But, patient and gentle. Well and truly earned his €60.00 in an hour. And that was including the dash to the van, when the monsoon hit.

  Anyway; Horses back in the meadow. We all went our ways. I got back to manning my Potter Traps and hammering the chaffie flocks. Nipping out to fetch them in. Ringing. Recording. Photographing, for my boss to check.

  At 20:00, this evening, I processed what would be todays last few chaffies. Put my ledger, scales and camera in their proper places, for tomorrow. Carried the three traps back out to my spot.

  And saw the hare, bounding across the top of the meadow, past the horses! How delightful! Not only had she stayed around. She'd come down onto 'my' land. Right where I'd been admiring a wild, cock pheasant, only a couple of hours ago.

 But, wait! She wasn't stopping! She came under the tape and was heading down my way! Hundred and twenty yards. Now, closing fast! Fuck!

  I'd stood up, from placing the traps. Now, I stood straight and still. Trying not to allow our eyes to meet. And in she came. Gently zig zagging. At times heading directly at me!

  I could barely believe it was happening. I wondered if she'd just run across my feet! Then, barely twenty foot away, almost parallel with me, in the meadow, she stopped.

  She sat up and looked straight at me. Light, chocolate brown little thing. (Believe me; Ye'll never appreciate an Irish Hare till ye've actually seen one, in the flesh. In Eire.)    

  And I felt the emptiness of my fucking fleece pocket! Why hadn't I just slipped that fucking camera into my pocket?! Using it all day. Now, now that I could desperately do with it ....!

 And she dropped back down. Turned. And loped off, back up the way she'd came. Exited the meadow and fucked off round the corner, at the top of the track.Back to where she'd been, earlier.

  Sorry I've no photo's. Nothing to do with ye not believing me otherwise. I'd just so like to have personally shown ye one of these weird little, chocolate  brown, rabbit like things we just call 'Irish Hares'.

Hare On The Meadow ....!

  Un Fucking Believable! Not seen one in a couple of years here now!

Just thought I'd let the Dogs out into the compound, free their heads a bit. I look up the meadow and there's this fucking great lump! It's brown and it didn't 'belong' there!

Stared at it for all I was worth. Could have been anything. Got the bin's out and it's a hare! She's just sitting there, getting her furry body buffeted by the wind. Not a care in the world!

  Oh; And now she's gone. Might have sloped off while I wasn't looking. Or she may just be laying down.

What ever. She's Most welcome on 'my' land and I'll see that no one bothers her.

 Have to watch these bloody Dogs now. Or Niggy Niggy Ning Nang Noo will sure as eggs scent her and flush her.

That'll have the sharp eyed and faced Yellow Peril after her. And the Pesticle's sure to join in. What Evil Little Dog will contribute to this chaos, god alone knows!

I could do without it though.

Nigger: One - le Ding: One Behind The Ear! LOL!

Calm down sillys! le Ding, along with the rest of them, has just been out for a 'Sort Out' and is now back in his bed, groaning with contentment, as he does. Bless him!

No, it's just that today, on our daily walk up the track, an interesting little even occurred which has since actually 'sunk in' rather better and so revealed a little story I thought worth the telling here.

Up by my top gate, see, there's a little bit of rougher ground, just behind my top hedge. This is only a piddling little strip of ground, between the hedge and the track between two gates. However, it's still a little haven for anything not wishing to dodge stupid cattle so much as it would out on the open fields. Sort of place a fox might lay up. Ye know the sort.

So anyway; Nigger and Rats have shown an expectable bit of interest in this spot. Rats is a fuckin nuisance! If Anyone's going to lead one of my other Dogs off on a high adventure, it'll be rats! Get them shot, whilst she offers too small and nippy a target? Fucking charming! And, today, she invited Nigger to join her in the dance of death.

Off they've gone, straight down off the track and into Pat's lower fields. Nothing to bad there, because the cattle were no where to be seen and I could actually see quite a way from the track. I was especially unconcerned as they were, at first, simply sniffing around that little patch of scrubbier ground there. Then they moved out into the half acre field of juncus and it was actually quite nice to imagine Nig Nig was actually 'Working' the ground with some purpose and intent.

But, when they shot off down through the lower gate, thus entering a span of endless acres, virtually all of it out of sight behind hedges, unless they reappeared a mile away, near those distant sheep ....! Buggers both ignored my calls too. It was getting a bit tense making!

So, there's me, stood at this gate, gumming at my bottom lip. Orange Dog doing who knows what ~ probably just standing around with me. (We're both so clapped out now, standing around suits us fine). le Ding I have on an extending lead. I never lock it, so he's free to shoot off in all directions for a fair old way too. Seems he was just standing, watching too though.

Frankly, I'm so concentrated on my growing anxiety that two of my Dogs are off loose, disobeying me, and in plain sight of anyone around the rim of the basin ..... Oh! Fuck me! Look at that hare!

Sure enough, here she comes, straight through the lower gate the Unholy Allience have gone through. Right out of the field they're 'working'. She's come up the track, not rushing by any means. I observed and noted her almost fox like 'russet' fur as she quickly loped up the track. She probably noticed us lot, about fifteen foot or so before 'our' gate, and turned gently in her course. Past us she went and skipped on through a hedge gate and into the field beyond.

With that, I returned my attention to the two lead magnets below who, soon afterwards, reappeared and rejoined us. Wet, panting and pleased with themselves. Home we went and no more was said about the matter. Dogs will, after all, be Dogs. (Naughty Dogs! LOL!)


Now, let's try that again, shall we? Supposing I'm some prick with 'Issues'. So I feel the need to carry a Big, scarey Gun everywhere with me. And I see everything which might try to get away from me as a challenge to my 'manhood'.

First off; Two of my Dogs go galavanting. That could pan out either way. A/ I might take offence at their being too preoccupied to 'Hear' my commands. Thus I could very well shoot them as soon as they presented a target of themselves. Some Would!

B/ I might have stood there, kneading my own zip as I drooled over the prospect of them actually being 'working'. And, can ye imagine 'my' ecstacy when that little hare had come loping up the track there? I could've blown her fucking head clean off. Then I could've taken close up pictures of the carnage I'd wreaked and shown them on THL. " Hare, Head Shot With 12 Bore At Five Yards! (Pre Ban) "

Of course, with that attitude governing my pond life like responses; Is it not entirely feasible that I'd then have remembered le Ding there? He hadn't even made his presence known to me, throughout. Hadn't shot off after the clearly visible hare. Hadn't even whimpered. In fact, he must've just stood there beside me and watched her pass. Just as Orange Dog and I had done.

Dingo Dog's a Dog in his prime. Lean. Fit. Sharp as a razor. He saw that hare. He knew her for what she was. He could've ripped that lead from my hand, cleared that gate and been after her like a rush of wind. But he didn't. Because I never gave him any indication that I required him to. Good Dog!

But how about our alter character there? I wonder how many of That sort, in that circumstance, would have beaten le Ding round the head as useless, for not giving chase. Then dragged him home and put 'One Behind His Ear'. Another 'useless fucking cull'. And have been on his way to pick up his umpteenth Dog in a year or two tonight?


Nothing left to prove, me, see? Been there. Done all that. That hare's out there now, biting grass stems. My Dogs are sleeping around me. Good Dogs, the lot of them. They don't need to do anything to bolster my ego. I need no social crutches. Just the love and companionship of my good Dogs.

And I don't think this lot are proving bad Dogs. Nigger and Rats scented, searched for and pushed out that hare to perfection ~ she was their only concern. le Ding did exactly what I always bid of him on our walks; " Don't Dash, Ding! " Even confronted with a passing hare, Ding didn't dash. Orange Dog and I? We couldn't go 'Voom!' if ye stuck fifty thousand volts up our arses!

We're older now. We just like to watch.