Gun Fun ..... Men Only Need Read This!

Dean O' and I went somewhere today. We visited a bloke who has a .223 'AR15' semi automatic rifle. 30 round magazine. All but the last half of the barrel is cammo. And this fukka's fitted it with a £400 moderator. So, basically, we're talking about as close to a military spec 'Man Stopper' as a normal citizen's ever likely to get his hands on.

Not that there's actually any great likelihood of a normal citizen getting hold of one anyway. I mean, what the fuck could ye state ye wanted such a beast for? Starting ye own fuckin' Militia?! Anyway, no names. No pack drill. This guy has one. And he let us handle it today.

I've never heard a .223 fired before. I've fired an unmoderated .243 before. And That made me shit myself, because I was sure everyone else, for miles around, would thing WW3 had just kicked off! I've simply never Heard anything bang so fucking loud! But, this one had the best moderator money can buy. And I took my hearing aid out. My own .22 Hornet makes more row than I heard from this thing.

I reckon my own rifle recoils harder too. I mean; A fuckin' kiddie could fire this AR15. There was a recoil, I s'pose. But it was only a bit like being poked in the shoulder with a cushion.

And, firing a rifle on semi auto was quite the experience too! As fast as I could work the trigger. off she went. " Crack! ... Crack! Crack! Crack! Crack! Crack! Crack! " Can't ye just imagine the grin as I turned round after That?!

It seems there's also a way of firing this model in Full Auto too! " Bum Firing ", it's called. Now, I'm not big on the 'Toys for Boys' aspect of firearms. To me, all my guns are just tools.

I bought a lovely new pair of Stanley Side Cutters today too. Very nice. Feel great in the hand. I'll cut some old flex out with them tomorrow. But I hardly have a hard on about them. Much the same with my guns. They're tools to do my best work with.

Dean O's that much younger though. Things like this excite him. He had to try this 'Bum Firing' craic. So it was he held the rifle in the proscribed manner. Pointed it at the middle distant ground. And " CrackCrack! ". I seem to recall that, after a few words of guidance from our host, he then managed Three shots, all on automatic. That was cool.

But then, the true highlight of our little session. Our host took possession of the rifle. Held it so. And opened up! Fuck Me! That sound! But, more than that, seeing the turf ripping apart and flying off in all directions! And this wasn't a war film. This was Real Fire Power! Fuck sake; I barely caught Dean O's reaction, because I was heading off to the back of the queue!


Having said all that, of course? It was a bit of craic. A grand and half's worth of, undeniably very nice but, quite useless toy. I mean; Name me just One situation in which a Field Shooter is going to need, let alone be clear and safe, to loose off ten to thirty rounds of .223 in rapid succession. It's just silly.

Next time we pass that way though, all things being equal, we've been promised another new experience. This one I'm really quite looking forward to as well. Next time, I get to live fire a real hand gun. A .357 Magnum ! Now, This, even I'm looking forward to. Had it been a .44 Magnum ? I'd be drooling! I just Love the sound of a .44 Mag'. So blunt. Abrupt. Distinctive.

Who knows? One of these days ....? I mean; Who'd ever have thought I'd have got to fire an AR 15?

Dogs, Dyson's and Blowing Chunks .....

There is a connection! ..... Well; Alright, so the old gag about 'Blowing Chunks' probably caused me to wet myself, in front of my mother, when I was about sixteen. Must've been some sort of experience like that to have left such a lasting impression on me.

I had a 'Pit Bull' once who I called " Beef ". Somehow that name never once caused me to double up, in silent appreciation, as having called him " Chunks " would've done. " I like eating beef. " just doesn't touch the nerve like ..... anyway ....!

So, I have this Dyson. It's a DC16 something. First on the left inside that link, to their site, there. The Utter Bollocks! I've loved this thing since the evening I bought it. Back in December. It literally sits here, at my right hand. And that only because I haven't got round to Rawlplugging its little holder / charger to the wall yet. But it's still there. Apart from a Sig Sauer P226 what else could a man want beside him? Dogs aside, that is!

Straight up, people. This baby ~ my Dyson ~ was truly, obviously, designed and made by Men. For Men. And men living alone. It's the answer to our dreams!

It sits there, constantly on Charge (Yes, it's a Re Chargable. But no batteries, as such. It's a Plug and Stay thing) I just leave mine plugged in, 24 / 7. It's always ready when I want to use it.

And here's it's Best feature: A charge only lasts it five minutes of actual use! Yeppers, ye heard And read me right there. This baby sucks like a train, for about Five Minutes. Then simply cuts out, dead. Blessed Be!

Lads; A full on, fucking great, 'Can suck the life out of a carpet' hoover like a 'Big Dyson' may be the wifes dream. Fuck the wife! That's all ye married her for, right? But for we Born Again Lads? This muvva is a godsend.

Believe me. Five minutes of 'hoovering' the Dog deposited crap off ye bed, and from around the place? Then looking for other places to bother about, before that Five Minutes is up? Trust me on this; More often than not ye'll be Praying the fukka runs out, before ye will to keep doing such 'House Work' does! Then it can be back to ye computer and Dogs and shit for an hour or so, before ye might fancy doing ye books off.

I'm completely happy with my one. 'Blown Away', one might say. And that brings us full circle: Blowing Dogs!

To Be Continued ....!

(Only; I'm smashed. I feel this is quite enough for one read. And, I feel the 'point' is worth another, quicker, post. See ye tomorrow?)