Sunday, October 18, 2009
Guinea Pigs .....
How fucked up are they? I mean; These things need no introduction, do they? They're just weird little fucks that make even weirder noises. They do my head in.
In Peru, where they eat the bastards, people just have them dashing about the floors of their own living quarters. Imagine that? Watching these things running about under ye feet, shitting their weird little shits and making all that strange noise. Then catching hold of one and having it for dinner.
How do ye kill a Guinea Pig? Doesn't seem to have much neck there to get hold of. Frankly, I'd find it hard to just whack something so completely inoffensive, in cold blood. We're just not programmed to hurt the little shits, are we?
Of course, I've no doubt some idiots out there would Love to be able to line up free ranging Guinea Pigs in the over sized telescopic sights of their pre charged, black, and purportedly 'SAS' looking air rifles. Some people would like to have shot the little wren my magpies just caught.
And what about free ranging guinea pigs? There's a thought, isn't it? They have them in Peru. I'm given to believe it can get damn cold over there. Maybe it just isn't as tirelessly damp and cold as UK and Eire? Only, I can't help thinking; If guinea pigs ever stood a cellophane rat in hells chance of gaining a foot hold in this part of the world, surely they would've done so by now?
Imagine it if they had though. What would they do out there? Would they dig their own holes? Do they even live in holes? And I wonder what they eat? Grass, like sheep? Or would they go trundling along the hedgerow, having a bit of everything?
Big problem, of course, for the guinea pigs; 'Everything' would eat Them! Not exactly cut out for self defence, are they? Everything from weasles to badgers would be ploughing into them. Magpies to Goshawks.
Which leads me to wonder; How do they survive in Peru? Is Peru a land void of predators; Or do they only survive in peoples homes? I'd have a mind to get some for here. Only I can't see them lasting two minutes with Orange Dog around. I'd put some in my aviary. But the 'pies would kill them too.
Shame, really. Harmless seeming little creatures. Be amusing to have around. And they make a good noise too.
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Hi Ditch, a friend of mine kept guinea pigs outside. They escaped their cage and lived in the garden and went into the field behind the house. They didnt see them again for months, then a year later he saw one again out in the field grazing. They eat grass like rabbits and live above ground.
ReplyDeleteInteresting!
SAM
Good lord, that's absolutely fascinating! Cheers for that, Sam.
ReplyDeleteCan't say I can see it happening round here though. Horribly expensive little buggers. No where near as fast breeding as rats or rabbits. And, anyway, my Dogs would simply hunt them down.
A fun thought, but just that.
Sorry I took so long to clear ye Comment. VodaFuck's in rare form tonight. It's taken me exactly an hour just to open my fucking e mail!!!
I had a small colony living in an old rabbit bury on the shoot years back Ditch, they came and went as they pleased and bred from time to time too.
ReplyDeleteI really like them - I have got a pair out in the garden now for the kids.
The last couple I had were living rough in the garden for a couple of years and they kept the lawn like the 18th green at St Andrews.
OTC