'Wife Beater' Vests ....?

  What the fuck is it with these things? Do lunatics like them? Or, do they make a man into a lunatic? I'm seriously beginning to wonder!

  Have one here, see. Have it on, actually. My mum bought it for me. She's been dead for years now. Not really sure I've ever worn it before. But, I've had my biannual shower. It's blazing sunshine out. No one's been near me in weeks. Fuck it. I decided to pop this on. And it's transformed me!

  I'm stalking about the place feeling like The Incredible Hulk. Massive shoulders held back. Broad pectoral muscles pushing my arms out. I look like I'm carrying a fish tank under each arm.

  Much more of this? I'll be steeping my hands in 'petril' and making you tubes video's, challenging people to face me.

  Which would be stupid, on so many levels. Because I'm old. Worn out. Skinny ~ except for this fucking beer gut that appeared over night. I'm not a pikey. Not even fucking Irish. I'd look a cunt. 

  I probably do, already. 'Wife Beater', FFS. Is this what it is? Does putting one of these things on transform an ordinary man into an utter prick? 

  Or, is it that only a fucking prick would wear one in the first place?

  As ever: Answers on a postcard .....